One of the greatest shocks was when I saw my summer with Faith. The visions revealed to me what presaged those events, and somehow I was unsurprised even as it had been entirely unexpected. Shocked that it happened, but even so, understanding it in the greater framework of the story of my life.
I saw a winter, the same time as my final year of high school. A girl appeared in the vision, a girl that I had never seen, yet who was strangely familiar. Her hair was a short, light red, and her eyes were brown. There were things about her that reminded me of someone, but who that was, exactly, eluded me for the moment.
I recognized her town, just a few kilometres from my own. Even though the vision was of a nighttime scene, I saw landmarks that were familiar. She was in a van, driving home from a party with friends. Coming down the other side of the road was a speeding car. The car swerved on black ice, spun off the side of another car and then ran straight into their van, sending them off the road to collide into nearby trees. The vehicle was full, some died instantly, some were gravely injured. One of them had the presence of mind to dial 911 on their cellular phone even as they went into unconsciousness.
I wondered how this had any relevance to me, and then I was startled to find my vision taking me to Heaven, where Gambiel and Raphael were gathered with several angels. It was tremendously thrilling, to be lifted up past the clouds into a realm of jewelled buildings and marble floors
“The Lord our God has required me to do a special task,” Raphael was explaining. “Jeremiah here will be the temporary supervisor of the cherubim and seraphim while I am away.”
“I have particular Watcher duties that require me to be away as well.” Gambiel said. “This concerns me.”
“You can delegate most of those duties to the others…” Raphael began to suggest.
“Yes, but what about our ‘special case?’ I don’t know if we can leave that alone.” Gambiel said, attempting to be clandestine. I knew he meant Mara and me, and so did Raphael.
“My daughter is more than capable of taking care of it. She’s been handling that situation capably for nineteen years.”
“But never on her own.” Gambiel said.
“She does almost all of it on her own!” Raphael said emphatically. “We’ve had to intervene only twice. Ordinarily she works without any kind of supervision.”
“I know, but I feel uncomfortable not having one of us keeping on eye on the situation…”
“Mara can handle it. God trusted her with this mission, so I don’t think either of us needs to question that.”
With that, I was sent back to the earthly plane, having learned what I was supposed to know, apparently. For some period of time, she had Watcher duties in my life without anyone else watching over her shoulder. Just as I was speculating why this had anything to do with the car accident I had seen, I received an answer.
As soon as I fell asleep back home, Mara left my side for perhaps the first time in my life, and flew directly to the scene of the accident, where emergency crews had arrived in response to the 911 call. I don’t know how she knew about it, perhaps God communicated with her, perhaps she had a greater awareness of the world. What matters is that she knew, and went there.
Mara entered one of the ambulances, hovering over the red-haired girl. She was having a bad time of it, struggling to live. The paramedics were losing her. They got out those electric paddles from the crash cart to attempt to resuscitate her as her pulse flat-lined. At that moment, Mara descended upon her body, and entered it, the way I had seen demons possess my own body in my childhood. My “vision perspective” followed her into a physical representation of the spiritual plane she walked on as she entered the girl’s mind.
I heard the young woman’s thoughts, a panicked “I’m dying I’m dying I’m dying” and Mara’s sweet voice attempting to get her attention and soothe her. Gradually the litany stopped, and Mara could converse with the girl.
“Yes, you are dying. That is not the horrible thing most people make it out to be. Calm down, it’s going to be all right.” Mara told her. “I have a proposition for you.”
“Who are you?” The girl said in her mind, hearing a stranger in her thoughts. In my vision, it was visually represented by an image of the girl, shining brightly in the colour of the full moon, holding herself in fear. Mara was hovering around her in the same light, and the two of them were surrounded by darkness.
“I’m a friend. More specifically, I’m an angel.” Mara smiled. “I can save your life, if you want me to.”
“Why would you do that?”
“God sent me. You don’t want to die, correct?” Mara asked. “You’re not ready? If you want to live, I can heal you. There are only two conditions.”
“What are they?” The girl asked, curious.
“First of all, you seriously consider a lifestyle change. You haven’t been living like you believe in God.”
“Well, it’s not like I had any reason to believe before. I didn’t have angels showing up to tell me.” The girl said caustically.
“Well, you have now. It’s not like you have an excuse. I can’t make you have faith, but you could try. God would like that very much, He misses you.”
The girl seemed taken aback at these words. “God what?”
“He misses you.” Mara said, her voice tender. “God worries about everyone who turns from Him. It’s hard to see that the people you love don’t love you back.”
“God… loves me?” The girl’s voice grew quiet.
“I’m offering you a chance to reunite with that love. To live your life better the second time around. I will give you your life back, with the hope that you’ll spend your life trying to love God back. Not many people ever get such an opportunity. The only other condition I ask is that you let me borrow that life for six months, until September.”
“Borrow my life? If I give you six months, I get to live?” The girl asked.
“Yes.”
“I’ll do it.”
Mara descended upon the girl’s spiritual form, merging with it in a bright flash of light.
Back in the ambulance, the girl sucked in a deep breath and let out a great gasp of air, rising against the restraints on her gurney. The paramedics were stunned as she opened her eyes, for they had been certain they had lost her.
“Welcome back to the world, young lady.” One said, when he recovered from his shock. “Can you tell us your name, so we can contact your family?”
“I’m Faith Sheridan.”
No Man an Island 
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January 30, 2008 at 9:07 pm
Katie
It strikes me as rather odd that Ethan didn’t recognize Faith right away. I did.
Is Mara doing God’s will, or her own? Is it possible for her to do other than God’s will, like a human can? I seem to recall Rapheal saying he could only do God’s will, but I may have to go back and re-read that chapter.
I’m putting myself in the paramedic’s shoes here for a minute…schock would be my first reaction, and then I’d probably want to jump around joyously.
There’s probably a reason I’m not a doctor. I don’t think I’d be able to handle losing people.
January 30, 2008 at 9:33 pm
nomananisland
Look at it this way: the last time Ethan saw Faith was about eight or nine years ago, and her appearance had been altered by Mara’s presence. The last time he saw her before that was a decade earlier, when she occasionally joined in the Camelot game with her cousin Hope. In that sense, she would look related to people he knows without him ever knowing what she looks like on her own as an eighteen year old girl.
The Mara free will debate is an interesting one (if we had more people here to debate it). Anyway, eventually there will be an answer on the nature of her will — especially since angels always serve God, and human beings have free will. But I won’t give it away yet. 🙂
I think I could handle losing people, what would bother me is trauma to eyes and hands. I have this weird thing about other people hurting their eyes and hands, don’t ask me why. One time my friend ripped off his thumbnail by accident, and it made me squeamish for hours. My own blood doesn’t freak me out at all, and I can watch surgeries on television without a problem. But get a paper cut, and I’m all squirrelly.
January 30, 2008 at 9:43 pm
Katie
This makes sense to me. Losing my hands would be extremely difficult for me. What would I do? No typing, playing the piano, writing, drawing, giving massages, playing video or computer games, holding my kids would be difficult…
Obviously there are prosthetics that would allow me to do some of those things, but it would be difficult to adjust to.
Same with eyesight. I love to read and drive and watch my kids and my husband.
Ripping off nails = OW. -squirm.- Surgeries…never watched one. I have an easier time watching things than imagining them (particularly when they draw blood.) I HATE it when my kids get shots, but it’s easier when I’m holding them than when I leave the room and just hear them cry.
/end of off-topic rant. lol
January 31, 2008 at 1:18 am
Marguerite
I’m having a problem with the essence of the deal Mara offered Faith for her life. Telling her to seek God and do his will was good, but wanting to take over her life seems almost like a ‘deal with the devil’. Obviously, Mara learned a lot during that time, including what Ethan himself needed to learn; it’s just a deal like that goes against the nature of God.
January 31, 2008 at 1:21 am
nomananisland
That’s an interesting comment.
What is the nature of God?
January 31, 2008 at 2:25 am
Katie
I agree with this. Reading this chapter made me a bit uncomfortable, because it didn’t seem right to me that Mara would take over Faith’s body. It seems to me that Mara didn’t really give Faith much of a choice–give me six months of your life or die. That’s why I asked if she was doing her own thing or doing what God told her to do.
I dunno, it just made me uneasy.
Please rephrase that. You don’t generally seem like an uppity person.
January 31, 2008 at 2:59 am
Marguerite
This may be a rambling answer, so bear with me.
The simple answer is God’s very nature is ‘good’ and cannot tolerate evil. (Hence the need for the Savior to free us from our sin and it’s ultimate consequence of eternal death) God has given us free will, with which we can honor Him or not. You touch on God’s nature in your Mara chapters, and in Him allowing Raphael his earthly love. In that, as well, I wonder if this is something God would really do-we suffer the consequences of our own actions because we are sinful beings who cannot of our own volition do ‘good’; but the consequences aren’t ordained by God, they are the natural outcome of sin.
Mara, being 1/2 human and 1/2 angel, I could see doing this of her own idea (bargaining with Faith) but I still can’t fathom God ordering this action because it seems to affect Faith’s free will.
I’m really looking forward to you revealing the answer of whether Mara has free will!
(crossing my fingers that I did the quote thing correctly!)
January 31, 2008 at 1:17 pm
nomananisland
It’s a genuine question. What is the nature of God? How do you define it? How do you know? Who told you? The answers to those questions are important. I’m not about to impose my own beliefs on anyone, but just to point some things out:
God is not above bargaining. He and Abraham decide on how many innocent people will determine the fate of Sodom and Gamorrah. God is not above asking people to make sacrifices for their faith: Abraham was asked to give up Isaac, Jacob worked 14 years for Rachel, Jesus gave his life for the world.
So I’m asking a serious question: how do you define God’s nature and how does this chapter not live up to that definition?
January 31, 2008 at 2:38 pm
Katie
Sorry. I was tired and being overly grumpy/defensive. Please ignore me. 🙂
January 31, 2008 at 8:53 pm
Marguerite
I agree that God bargains, but he does not manipulate. Mara’s action strikes me as more manipulative than bargaining, because it is with Faith’s life. Abraham was trying to save lives, and initiated the bargaining. I also agree that God does require sacrifice–just doing what God wants sacrifices our human nature which is self-centered. God requires us to give up self in service of him.
When Mara is forced to give up protecting Ethan from every evil, that strikes me more as something God would ‘do’-Ethan shouldn’t be protected from temptation and every evil in order to grow. Just as every other human is faced with the choice of doing right or wrong (serving God or not) Ethan needs to be able to make that choice.
January 31, 2008 at 9:23 pm
Katie
I like the thought of God as a Dad, personally. You can ask him for advice about anything and everything, but whether you choose to take his advice or not is entirely your decision. That thought can be very very freeing at times (ever get tired of having to decide what’s for dinner?) but at the same time, human pride gets in the way. “I’m doing just fine on my own, thanks, what do I need God for?”
Not sure where angels and demons fit in that schematic.
January 31, 2008 at 9:48 pm
nomananisland
God doesn’t manipulate – what do you call it when He promised Abraham an eternal right to the Promised Land through his descendants, for the small price of obedience — and then tells him he must kill Isaac? If Abraham obeys, he honours God — but his son dies, and he loses the Promised Land. However, if he disobeys God and lets Isaac live, then he loses God’s favour — and then no longer has a claim on the Promised Land. God was bargaining with Isaac’s life and Abraham’s future.
As to Mara — Faith was dying. Mara gave her a free will choice between a second chance at life, or staying where she was – dead. That second chance had the proviso of giving up her self in service to God for six months and then trying to live life differently, in relationship with God instead of apart from Him. Without Mara’s intervention, Faith would have been dead anyway. Faith loses nothing, and has everything to gain — including an eternity with God.
I would say that here Mara is giving Faith the same choice Ethan had to make with the demons — between good and evil, life and death, service to God or separation from God. Faith already chose life without God once, and Mara gives her the opportunity to try again.
January 31, 2008 at 10:23 pm
Marguerite
To me, manipulation is used when the manipulator has something to gain. God called Abraham, told him all he had to do was obey, and Abraham did. What did God get out of that? God doesn’t stand to gain anything from our obedience, we do.
I agree that Faith got the ‘better end of the deal’ but Mara gained from it as well. That’s why it seems manipulative.
Kind of off the subject: If Abraham had chosen to disobey God, do you think he would have understood what was lost? Do you think God would have called someone else? Do you think others faced that choice before Abraham did and chose their child over God?
January 31, 2008 at 11:38 pm
nomananisland
God gained Abraham’s obedience, and that of all his descendants who have spent millenia building temples, writing books, offering worship and making sacrifices. God manipulated Pharoah by “hardening his heart” against Moses, so that God’s power could be displayed in Egypt and cause belief among the tribes of Israel. He took away someone’s free will in order to gain twelve tribes who ever since have worshipped him, and who drove the Canaanites from the Promised Land.
What did Mara gain? Six months with Ethan, only to return to her life of not being able to talk to him or touch him. What would be worse: never touching him, or being able to once and having it taken away? Especially when she’s spent four thousand years being lonely. What did Abraham gain? He dies before he sees his descendants rise to power. What did Moses gain? He dies before his people entered the Promised Land.
I think your speculation on people before Abraham very interesting — that maybe there were those whose faith wasn’t strong enough. History only records the winners, but it’s interesting to wonder if maybe there were others who couldn’t live up to God’s expectation.
My only rebuttal to that interesting idea is the book of Jonah, where God chooses an unwilling prophet and then orchestrates events to make his service happen. From the biblical text itself, I don’t think God ever backs a loser, I think God knows what will happen before God starts. Only Abraham would have been called, because he was born to succeed.
Further to that — God asked Abraham to kill Isaac to prove his faith. Yes, Abraham was let off the hook when he proved his faith was real, but he didn’t know that. He only knew what he had been asked to do. Isn’t that manipulating events to get a desired result? If God hadn’t stopped him, Abraham would have sacrificed his own son. Do the ends justify the means? What does that event say about the nature of God?